Hello again, sports fans! This is Harry Gobbo, investigative reporter for OSPN, reporting live from our studios here in Orclando! The big story today is the continuing controversy surrounding the MML and our favorite team, the Wrecking Kru! Remember our last report that tied each member of the Coaches Board to the stunning, and frankly sickening, decision not to have a replay of the tainted game between the Kru and Dignity? Well, it continues. The League just released its season 5 schedule, and there is a glaring prejudice against the Kru! For more on this story, we will go to Coach Aven, who is with us by Cabalvision from ‘Ome Turf, the Kru’s home stadium.
Thank you for being with us today, Coach. We know you are busy preparing the boys for the season opener. What can you tell us about the Season 5 schedule?
“Thank you Harry, for having me here, and for doing an excellent job in your reports. As you know, the Kru “had our day in court” concerning the OT game against Dignity, and the Coaches Board saw fit to deny us our right to a replay. They sided with their boy. What followed was a few traded accusations on both sides about corruption and brain farts and not knowing what one was doing. Many wondered if the board, myself included, would levy a fine or suspension against the Kru for all of the commotion after that despicable referee stole the game from us. Well, there was no fine or suspension, but I believe it was because they decided to use the schedule to pay us back. Out of the seven games we will play this season, ONLY 2 of those games will be at home! That means FIVE games on the road! So, now because of this decision, the Kru will lose revenue from at least one more home game, possibly more, the Kru fans will be punished unjustly, and our opponents rewarded! Our only home games will be the opener against Dignity, and week 5 against Just Norsin Around. We will have to travel to face the Commissioner’s team, no surprise there. We have three straight road games, and finish with two on the road. It looks like the league wants to keep the Kru from Season 5 playoffs! What a travesty!”
Coach, that is a terrible schedule. But, if it were another conspiracy, wouldn’t they have given Dignity the home game against WK?
“No, Harry, that would have been too obvious, wouldn’t it? By giving us the home game against Dignity, it makes it appear they are not taking sides with the High Elves. They probably have plans to slip in another biased referee to even the odds. Well, Wrecking Kru has a major announcement. We have re-hired Stonepuke to be a part of the team. He will not be on the pitch, but will serve as a guard for the referee’s entrance into the stadium! He has been given orders to eat the slimy referee if he shows up again. All other referee’s will be properly vetted before being allowed entrance into ‘Ome Turf Staduim.”
Coach, has there been any further developments in Wrecking Kru’s case against the MML?
“No, Harry, there hasn’t. It’s as if the League feels they can just ignore it, and it will go away. You know, out of sight, out of mind. We added a complaint in our case against the league, because we kept hearing “Well, it was unfair to both coaches. Coach Sestonn got a raw deal, too.” HOW DID HE GET A BAD DEAL? He was given a gift he didn’t earn! His team was positively affected by the underhanded doings of the referee. But, they knew all along that would be the case, because they hired the referee to make that decision. Despite this fact, among many others, the complaint falls on deaf ears. Our only real recourse will have to be on the pitch this season, but I must tell Kru fans not to expect many wins this season. The boys are plenty upset, and have talked about reverting to “traditional Orc-style of play”. I think they have been practicing dirty plays, fouling, and any other means to remove opposing members, PERMANTLY, if possible. We might not score touchdowns, but we will foul and attempt to injure all who have wronged us.”
Well, there you go, sports fans! Straight from Coach Caven’s mouth! I, for one, love the possibility of seeing some good ole’ Orc fouling in the coming season! Who cares about wins, if you can kill and maim a team and keep them from winning? Thanks for joining this special edition of WK BloodBowl, I’m Harry Gobbo, for OSPN, signing off!