This post is part of the series Season 14 awards
Apologies to all. Home and work is seriously affecting my spare time at the moment so my series of stat based articles have fallen far behind. As you will see this article was started some time ago, but I’m not going to edit it! I will try to catch up as quick as possible but at my current speed I will be about 4 seasons behind by the time we reach season 20. To that end, if someone would like to volunteer and pick up the mantle going forward. Let me know and I can take it up with Preach.
Season 14 has been and gone and what a season it was! First off, let’s congratulate our champions More Shots, previously coach of the Bill COWher Power Hour, and Thunden (HoF), coach of Olympus Risen, for securing the Pro and Challenge League trophies respectively. They played excellently throughout and were deserving winners. Olympus Risen are rocking the Pro’s and the Power Hour are still nursing a hangoverl!
Before we look at the individual records let’s recognise a team that achieved a feat never attained before in the Pro’s. Disco Divas completed the regular season with a perfect 7-0-0. They join the Slaan Seers, who had managed the same record in season 9 of the Challenge League. Well done to Balwen for this great feat.
So who wants to know what players scored the most touchdowns last season? Is it an elf or a skaven player? For the Pro league:-
|2||Greased Up Deaf Guy||Stop Rolling Ones!!!||ReznorRulesYou||6||10|
|3||No one can see me||The Rolling Ones||JimSardonic||7||8|
|5||Soaped Up Mute Guy||High Wings of Hope||The_Stu176||7||7|
|8||Christophe von Slash||Factor-50 United||VpowerV||6||6|
|9||Lounge||Lord of the Skinks||Lazertrip91||7||6|
|10||Sir Gilhart Godcannon||Order ofThe Holy Squirrel||AndyCuk||7||6|
It’s an elf and a skaven! Joint top with 10 scores in 6 games each, Slinij and Greased Up Deaf Guy (who also jointly topped the chart in season 13) lead the way in season 14. Congratulations to both, though still far short of the 16 scored by Lazy Smurf (a human) in season 10.
In the CL:-
|1||Skreamute of Hell||The Wet Bandits||Fire_Talker||7||11|
|2||Lazy Smurf||Los Pumas||discodavo||7||10|
|3||Han YOLO||Solus savers||CHASEJJ||7||10|
|4||Johnny Cage||Test Your Might||Stump_Humper||7||6|
|7||Will Stutley||The Merry Band of Men||RandTheMad||7||6|
|8||Harmarg Paws||Horrific Hairballs||momomcphee||7||6|
|9||Bob Dronkowski||Bugman’s Bellringers||Umphreysmagoo||6||6|
|10||George W Bush||Disgruntled Republicans||jaredwagner90||7||6|
It’s a skaven! Skreamute of Hell picked up 11 touchdowns in the season. Well done to that gutter runner! This is a tad short of another gutter runner, the previously mentioned Slinij (see above) who scored 13 times just last season. With no skaven in the league for season 15, another race has a chance to take the top spot.
Let’s look at the rushers for season 14. Did Lounge hold down a title he has so often dominated, on the way to the pro final? :-
|1||Sir Gilhart Godcannon||Order ofThe Holy Squirrel||AndyCuk||7||380|
|2||Lounge||Lord of the Skinks||Lazertrip91||7||378|
|3||F*** It||Stop Rolling Ones!!!||ReznorRulesYou||7||368|
|4||Kjelle||Revang of the dwarfs||royke033||7||338|
|5||Knut Claydamn||Earthshacker Cannons||Evuccifer||7||334|
|7||Matt||Innsmouth Deep Ones||Whiskey_Tornado||7||298|
|9||Sobhis Takhra||Undead But Worse||teddytom||6||294|
No! The little blighter fell just 2 yards short (he probably did snake eyes at some point). Sir Gilhart Godcannon surpassed Lounge last season with 380 yards. Excellently done, brave Sir Knight. This is still far short of the record of 626 rushing yards for Lycosidae in season 10. Hard to imagine someone getting close to that.
The CL all time record is more attainable, but still a tough nut to crack. Did anyone get close?:-
|1||Boomer Redmane||Black Rock Belchers||HornetMML||7||428|
|2||Han YOLO||Solus savers||CHASEJJ||7||404|
|3||Johnny Cage||Test Your Might||Stump_Humper||7||400|
|4||Skreamute of Hell||The Wet Bandits||Fire_Talker||7||400|
|5||Bob Dronkowski||Bugman’s Bellringers||Umphreysmagoo||6||348|
|7||Ridder||Detriot is Gotham||JRyda275||7||290|
|8||Fingon the Valiant||Spawn of Ungoliant||almaforever||7||276|
|9||Lazy Smurf||Los Pumas||discodavo||7||272|
|10||Krito of Mordheim||The Wet Bandits||Fire_Talker||7||268|
Getting closest was Boomer Redman with an impressive 428 rushing yards. Well done you beareded stunty! Left all the other CL players in his dust but came short of the 512 yards inflicted in season 10 by Billy with no credit, of the BlackIron SwampDonkeys.
Let’s turn next to the throwers. High Elven throwers often dominate the top spot but let’s see if that happened in season 14.
|1||F*** It||Stop Rolling Ones!!!||ReznorRulesYou||7||238|
|2||Mátanefindir Hadilinas||The Rolling Ones||JimSardonic||7||124|
|4||Sleepless in Seattle||Hopeless Necromantics||seriousjest||7||64|
|5||Belsathion Tantansyr||Vermilion Vanquishers||CavalierArcher||7||62|
|6||Peasant Venom||Ubersreik Flamers||Gerdleah||7||56|
|7||Charles de Couronne||Mousillon Morningstars||sturmjarl||7||54|
|8||Orastien “Fisticuff”||High Wings of Hope||The_Stu176||7||52|
|9||Matt||Innsmouth Deep Ones||Whiskey_Tornado||7||52|
In the Pro’s, a wood elf stormed way ahead of anyone else in the league with a very respectable 238 yards. F*** It of Stop Rolling Ones!!! put everyone else in the shade. Great job! Still this is a whopping 118 yards short of the record set by Billy “Magician” Graham from season 5. Did anyone in the Challenge League come close to either of these totals?
|1||Abe Lincoln||Disgruntled Republicans||jaredwagner90||7||98|
|2||Free Syx||We the Norse||theDO0MFROG||7||96|
|3||Antonio K. Constance||Elfi Italiani Indolenti||calle_maze||5||78|
|4||Longshot||The Redwood Rangers||xFOX__||6||70|
|5||Bulls-eye||The Redwood Rangers||xFOX__||5||62|
|6||Freddy Fingers||Los Pumas||discodavo||7||52|
|7||Morganti “Master”||Sanguineous Dignity||Sestonn||7||48|
|8||Rabbit||The Wood Chippers||ClownZombie||7||48|
|9||Turtle||The Wood Chippers||ClownZombie||6||38|
|10||Robin Of Locksley||The Merry Band of Men||RandTheMad||4||30|
Unfortunately no, but just winning the award in season 14 was Abe Lincoln with 98 yards. Congratulations to you. It’s been a while I think since a human topped the passing charts. This is still short of the record of 168 yards set by Windmill of the Disco Divas from season 11.
From throwers to receivers. These guys often hogged the touchdowns scored by their team so there should be some similarity with previous tables.
|1||Greased Up Deaf Guy||Stop Rolling Ones!!!||ReznorRulesYou||6||12|
|2||Soaped Up Mute Guy||High Wings of Hope||The_Stu176||7||8|
|3||No touchie McGoo||Manchuckster United||TarnMison||5||7|
|4||No one can see me||The Rolling Ones||JimSardonic||7||7|
|5||Eomund Mehia||Manchuckster United||TarnMison||4||6|
|6||Christophe von Slash||Factor-50 United||VpowerV||6||6|
|7||Oswald the Vanquisher||Claw & Score||Glowworm-707||7||6|
|8||Yvil Kneivel||ATX Longthorns||dmdouble0||7||5|
|9||Sir Gilhart Godcannon||Order ofThe Holy Squirrel||AndyCuk||7||5|
Winning the battle of the elves this time round is Greased Up Deaf Guy with an impressive 12 catches. This was far ahead of anyone else in the Pro’s for season 14. Still this was a couple short of the all time record held by A.B. of the Longbomb Carpenters, set back in season 11.
|1||Delon Wright||We the Norse||theDO0MFROG||7||11|
|2||Swiftwind||The Redwood Rangers||xFOX__||7||6|
|5||Juan Giro||Los Pumas||discodavo||7||5|
|6||Will Stutley||The Merry Band of Men||RandTheMad||7||5|
|7||Login Brown Leaf||The Redwood Rangers||xFOX__||7||5|
|8||Mashzy Hide||Taif Tigers||BigBadger01||7||4|
|9||Melian||Spawn of Ungoliant||almaforever||7||4|
In the challenge league a new team and new player took the top spot and surprisingly was not an elf! Delon Wight of We the Norse, almost had double the number of catches than any other player in the challenge league. An extremely impressive performance and shows even Norse can have another side to their game. This is still 3 short of the season 5 record set by Sililith Sprintchamp.
Next we move onto the brutes of the MML. These guys like to leave the bloodied bodies of their opponents splattered across the astrogranite. So who lead the way for most knock outs in the Pro’s?
|1||Bloody Thorn||ATX Longthorns||dmdouble0||7||10|
|2||Tiple H||Hopeless Necromantics||seriousjest||7||9|
|3||Karlund Livingtongue||Earthshacker Cannons||Evuccifer||6||8|
|4||Craly Mantle||Magrita Misfits||beerz1313||7||8|
|5||Wulskusk Lowell||Hopeless Necromantics||seriousjest||7||7|
|6||Micah Fenrir||Claw & Score||Glowworm-707||7||7|
|7||Kantarg Rugtail||Claw & Score||Glowworm-707||5||6|
|8||Dragmáll Bóla||Golden Discipline||triperis||7||6|
|9||Vasilissa the Pretty||Golden Discipline||triperis||7||6|
|10||Louis d’Epee||Mousillon Morningstars||sturmjarl||7||6|
An elf! Surely not. Let me double check that…confirmed! Bloody Thorn of ATX Longthorn bedazzled her opponents with her flowing hair and skimpy uniform, before delivering brutal spinning heel kicks to their head! On 10 seperate occasions no less. This is 6 short of the record held by Iztssa of the Slaan Seers set back in season 11.
In the Challenge league:-
|1||Hugo Valdred||The Merry Band of Men||RandTheMad||7||8|
|2||Dekan Starebaag||Taif Tigers||BigBadger01||7||7|
|3||Toof “Get Ya” Num||Needham Hill Not Highs||Just_Stevie13||7||7|
|4||Solomon Grundy||Detriot is Gotham||JRyda275||5||7|
|5||Melian||Spawn of Ungoliant||almaforever||7||6|
|6||Delta Force||The Arbiters||hezekiah87||7||6|
|7||Logan Bluefur||The Arbiters||hezekiah87||7||6|
|8||Belhk||Black Rock Belchers||HornetMML||7||6|
|9||Founders||Needham Hill Not Highs||Just_Stevie13||7||6|
|10||Will Scarlet||The Merry Band of Men||RandTheMad||7||6|
A human this time! Where are the chaos and dwarves at? That’s right, they are below Hugo Valdred who managed 8 knock outs to take the accolade. This is only half of the total set by Coughee McLung of Plague Inc back in season 12. Well done to Hugo on this achievement.
Let’s now look at the next group who took their brutality a bit further. Quite often taking their opponents completely out of the game. Most casualties will surely bring a sense of normality:-
|1||Jolly Jaywalker||Disco Divas||Balwen2013||7||10|
|2||Bloody Thorn||ATX Longthorns||dmdouble0||7||9|
|3||Micah Fenrir||Claw & Score||Glowworm-707||7||9|
|4||Pixie Not so sweet||The Pumpkin Kings||DwarfGiant||7||8|
|6||Ball Breaker||Ubersreik Flamers||Gerdleah||7||7|
|7||Tiple H||Hopeless Necromantics||seriousjest||7||7|
|8||Hisil Drung-Troll||Dio’s Midgets||DionysisA18||7||7|
|9||Disco Downtown||Undead But Worse||teddytom||7||7|
|10||Kah Alqui Paos’y||Innsmouth Deep Ones||Whiskey_Tornado||7||7|
F’Orcin’ hell! Another elf!!! Jolly Jaywalker of Disco Divas helped his team onto a perfect regular season with 10 injuries on his opponents. Not so jolly for everyone else. This was also just 1 ahead of Bloody Thorn, again showing her prowess for destruction on the Blood Bowl field. This is still far short of the 16 casualty record set by Smashing Pumpkin of the Weeping Widowmakers in season 10. Can the challenge league continue to produce some bizarre results?:-
|1||Lorenzo Brown||We the Norse||theDO0MFROG||6||12|
|2||Logan Bluefur||The Arbiters||hezekiah87||7||10|
|3||Hugo Valdred||The Merry Band of Men||RandTheMad||7||10|
|4||Founders||Needham Hill Not Highs||Just_Stevie13||7||8|
|6||Jonas Valanćiünas||We the Norse||theDO0MFROG||7||7|
|7||Onyx||Legends Of Spawn||Spawn_Of_Cthulu||5||7|
|8||Dekan Starebaag||Taif Tigers||BigBadger01||7||6|
|9||Belhk||Black Rock Belchers||HornetMML||7||6|
Another human, but of the norse variety. Lorenzo Brown of We the Norse finished clear of the rest of the CL with an impressive 12 casualties. Well done to you! This is just 2 short of the all time CL record held by Streaky from Missouri of the BlackIron Swampdonkeys, set back in season 10.
So let’s take a look at the killers from season 14. These guys apparently get bonuses for the number of skulls they collect. In the Pro’s:-
|InflictedDead – Best Season|
|3||Tiple H||Hopeless Necromantics||seriousjest||7||2|
|5||Anderson Halifax||St. Mahlbuerne Pioneers||HC-Vanselow||6||1|
|6||Pixie Not so sweet||The Pumpkin Kings||DwarfGiant||7||1|
|7||Bloody Thorn||ATX Longthorns||dmdouble0||7||1|
|9||Charles de Couronne||Mousillon Morningstars||sturmjarl||7||1|
|10||Cecil Elmhurst||St. Mahlbuerne Pioneers||HC-Vanselow||7||1|
4 players managed 2 kills each. What is the connection between those players? They were all players that came from my farm teams! Celeborn, Sneeei,Tiple H and Dusk all did well but fell 2 short of the record held by Nice ‘n’ Sticky of Just Norsin’ Around and Poor Yorick of All Wight on the Night set in seasons 5 and 12 respectively.
In the CL:-
|InflictedDead – Best Season|
|2||Harmarg Paws||Horrific Hairballs||momomcphee||7||2|
|3||Obsidian||Legends Of Spawn||Spawn_Of_Cthulu||4||2|
|4||Onyx||Legends Of Spawn||Spawn_Of_Cthulu||5||2|
|6||Geomideer the Mouldering||Kill da Carrot MML||gohron204||7||2|
|7||Sara Palin||Disgruntled Republicans||jaredwagner90||7||2|
|9||Holt||The Redwood Rangers||xFOX__||6||1|
|10||Rauserr Positron||Elfi Italiani Indolenti||calle_maze||6||1|
With 3 kills, Isis of de Nile collected the most skulls in season 14. Well done to you! This tied the record which is now held by 7 players. Can someone get 4 kills in season 15?
So now we move on to the interceptors. This is normally quite a hotly contested category. Everyone normally gets 1 or no interceptions! True to form that remained the case in both leagues.
|1||Don Victor||Lustria Carpenters||stolzi84||2||1|
|2||Stone Cold||ATX Longthorns||dmdouble0||7||1|
|3||Lord Mitt of Romney||Mousillon Morningstars||sturmjarl||7||1|
|4||Morphael Beastmaster||Repulsive Ratlings||StuffnJunk84||6||1|
|5||Timothy Ceslav||Factor-50 United||VpowerV||7||1|
|6||Natural Odors||Stop Rolling Ones!!!||ReznorRulesYou||7||1|
|7||Kiirdur Aladanae||The Rolling Ones||JimSardonic||6||1|
|1||Unnamed Halfling #2||North Shire Nobodys (MML)||RJCarrot||5||1|
|2||Johnny Cage||Test Your Might||Stump_Humper||7||1|
|3||Gil-Galad||Spawn of Ungoliant||almaforever||7||1|
|4||Morgoth||Spawn of Ungoliant||almaforever||7||1|
|5||Clay Face||Detriot is Gotham||JRyda275||7||1|
|6||Amun Ra||de Nile||Blue6Maxx||7||1|
|7||Traclaw||Black Heart Buccaneerz||doddfactor||7||1|
|8||Filth||Fantastic Fumbling Filth||DrWrongpipes||7||1|
|9||Morglum Eat’Hand||Green Meat||BrunfireARGNR||7||1|
|10||Smurg Muh Nurg||Legends Of Spawn||Spawn_Of_Cthulu||5||1|
Congrats to you all! The record in the Pro league remains 2, which is held by 3 players. We now have 45 players in the CL on 1 interception!
Finally we end as we always do, looking at those players who don’t just take one for the team, they take many hits for the team and never give in (until they are killed). Let’s take a look at the best punching bags from the Pro league in season 14:-
|2||Orastien “Fisticuff”||High Wings of Hope||The_Stu176||7||5|
|4||Count Hector von Rot||Factor-50 United||VpowerV||7||5|
|6||Elvan Slyeye||Stop Rolling Ones!!!||ReznorRulesYou||7||5|
|7||Vanval Blazerunner||Vermilion Vanquishers||CavalierArcher||4||4|
|8||Verwarthil Undomiel||High Wings of Hope||The_Stu176||6||4|
|10||JoFro the Loquacious||Mousillon Morningstars||sturmjarl||7||4|
Top of the charts is a rat unsurprisingly. Fituk of the now retired Repulsive Ratlings managed to get knocked out 6 times for his team in the regular season. His name will go down in history, forever remembered by the Ratlings fans. In the CL:-
|1||Harry||The Wet Bandits||Fire_Talker||7||7|
|2||Stoat||The Wood Chippers||ClownZombie||7||6|
|3||Unnamed Halfling #13||North Shire Nobodys (MML)||RJCarrot||6||6|
|4||Holt||The Redwood Rangers||xFOX__||6||5|
|5||Mohovil “Delicious”||Sanguineous Dignity||Sestonn||7||5|
|6||Abubakar Imhef||The Abracadavers||UncleDondie||7||5|
|7||Unnamed Halfling #4||North Shire Nobodys (MML)||RJCarrot||7||5|
|8||Jumbce Creep||The Wet Bandits||Fire_Talker||6||5|
|10||Abe Lincoln||Disgruntled Republicans||jaredwagner90||7||5|
With a hugely impressive average knock out rate of 1 per game, Harry (another rat) of The Wet Bandits helped his team to the promised land of the Pro league, beating all contenders to the coveted golden neck brace trophy.
So there you have it. Congratulations to all the players this season who made the charts.
Looking at the history I started this article on the 27th September! Honestly I’m not that slow at typing. It hopefully won’t take me as long to get the rest of the articles out for you to view.