Straight from the Warthogs mouth!

You join me here in the dark forests of Wheldrake in the Northern Lands as I await the arrival of the coach of the Thugz of Wheldrake that is Hairy_Warthog. Little is known about this character who’s chaos team ranked as one of the lower teams last season.
The smell of rotting flesh is high in the air and mixed with the nauseating stench of goat dung it is quite over powering and it soon became obvious Mr Warthog had arrived.
.
I suggest by the smell that personal hygiene is not high on his agenda and I do question my safety as I see the looming figure of a Minotaur hulking up behind so intend to make this interview as brief as possible.
.
BS. Mr Warthog, you coach the Thugz of Wheldrake, not the greatest MML team out there right now, do you have any predictions for season 3?
.
HW …………pain.
.
BS Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh k! Moving on, have you made any new signings for the coming season?
.
HW The Thugz welcome a new batman with proven blocking skills by the name of Smirnoff. We acquired him from the farm team Bill Cowher Power 1/2 hour and he boasts inflicting 11 injuries in 11 matches so he should fit in well with the Thugz.
.
BS I look forward to see him on the astro granite this season. Do you have any personal rivalries with the other teams or coaches?
.
HW it’s not personal at all, we don’t like anybody! When you’ve got most of the team who can’t even pick up the ball, there’s no time for being nice when all they’re good at is bashing!! We are lucky enough to have had one of our goat boys to have paid attention in mutation class and acquired an extra set of arms which should work in our favour.
.
BS You also coach a number of Farm teams. Can you tell me about them?
.
HW Hairyz Warthogz are a young chaos team that have racked up a few matches. The one to watch is the young Minotaur stood behind you, President Bull Clinton he replaces are former Mino who was murdered by a troll who shall remain nameless. I have acquired a Breton team and a human team too, but I just like to see them scream in pain!
.
BS So finally can you tell me a bit more about yourself?
.
HW what can I say? We mainly play during the dark hours. I like darkness. It’s my friend. This is due to working at a jailer at the Black Stronghold. Can’t say I’ve got the most the most experience coaching and I still don’t understand that passing rubbish! Once you’ve got the ball, keep hold of it, put your head down and run! With any luck you’ll disembowel an elf with your horns!!
.
BS OK, thanks for your time and could you please call your Minotaur off I can feel his breath on my buttocks!!! I need to get off now!!
This is Bork Squzzleturd reporting from Cabalvision channel 6 in the dark forests of Wheldrake…….now get me out off here!!!!!!!