The Aristotle Agyrazkodas Files Pt. 4

After an idyllic preseason sabbatical to the anonymous paradise laden resort owned by Aristotle Agyrazkodas, the gates of Camberwell Citadel was swarmed by the devout hooligans pledging their unwavering allegiance to not only a St. Mahlbuerne Pioneers crew underneath the captaincy of “Wurlitzer” Czechkowski, but a core of promising players in Vincent Yorkshire, Israel Charlton, Anderson Halifiax, Samuel Goodwin and Alexander Gembrook.

From the beginning, the assistant coaches made a gallimaufry of miscalucations as Orlando Fairholm was plugged into line of scrimmage duty instead of using his pinpoint punting precision which ultimately lost them any defensive kind of advantage positionally. The Kislev combination of Bigfoot (Not exactly Teddy Ruxpin in the manners department), Yuri Garagin and Art Bell proved to be a bunch of painful thorns in the Pioneers side and fundamental components to what was to be a 2-1 “W” for the flippin’ force of Kislev.

Now it’s back to the Mattaki Mitsuji Metroplex’s HQ as they’re scouting the Innsmouth Deep Ones (Chaos) for their second game of what is promising to be an interesting season, who will be the thirteenth member of the squad as the swiftness of Hamilton Newbury was waived prior to the season debut and a press conference with Vincent Yorkshire on what must be fulfilled in order to rise through the ranks of a merciless MML Champions League…

“First things first, remaining optimistic and understanding that this season serves as a building block is the biggest challenge we’ve got to get a grip on. Rest assured, the crew knows that the road ahead which has us facing Chaos, Khemri, Wood Elves, Skaven, Orcs and Undead will be liberally littered with a fair share of bumps and bruises, but we’re here to stay as “Wurlitzer” isn’t going to let us quit and personally looks forward to the game against the “Greenskins” of GoDawg’s Geezers (“Wurlitzer” Czechkowski was orphaned as a child when a brigade of Orcs pillaged the township he was raised in and has a longstanding hatred of them eversince).

Well tune into your Cabalvision Crystal Balls next round as the St. Mahlbuerne Pioneers will tackle the Innsmouth Deep Ones and I’m Marvin Kettlesworth signing out as I’ve got a steaming tray of moussaka coming out of the oven that my belly is already lovin’…



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