Morningstar team-owner, Count Archibald Drumph has been uncharacteristically silent through much of Season 5 of the MML Pro League, where the hapless Morningstars have posted a 0 win, 3 ties and 3 losses, circling the bottom of their play pool. Count Drumph sat down this week with Harry gobbo of Just Score .for an exclusive interview.
Gobbo: Thanks for granting this interview Count Drumph. You and The Morningstars have had some troubles this season, both on and off the field. What’s been going on in Mousillon?
Drumph: Your welcome, Harry. Let’s me first say that I requested this interview…against the advice of my legal team…to set the record straight. These past weeks have been difficult for me, the Morningstars and all of Mousillon. Blatant lies from some cheerleaders..no doubt coerced to do so by the Scheming Commissioner PreachMJ and his minions on the MML Board…claiming I touched them inappropriately (the cheerleaders…NOT Preach…or his minions *wink*) These sort of things happen in locker rooms…sometimes even the women’s locker rooms. Harry, I cannot be blamed if these pom-pom girls don’t understand the Royal privileges bestowed upon myself as a Count. You know what I mean, Harry *wink*.
Gobbo: So you do not deny these women’s claims, Count?.
Drumph: I will not dignify these peasant accusations with any further response. Next question.
Gobbo: Oookay. Well…How can you explain the poor showing the Morningstars have had in the MML Pros this season?
Drumph: Harry, the MML Pro league is rigged. The incorrigible Commissioner and his lackeys on the MML Board will do ANYTHING to keep ME…and Bretonnia form succeeding in the MML. Did you know Harry, that this board has control to “liberally” change match results on a whim? What if I told you that I saw Cabalvision casts of matches where the Morningstars “might” have won some of the matches that they “eventually” lost?
Gobbo: That’s a bold statement, Your Holiness. Do you have any proof to back up these charges?
Drumph: Harry…I saw the twitch-casts myself that Coach Sturmjarl recorded…but…unfortunately Coach Sturmjarl does not have the forethought to archive his Twitch on The YouTube. Still…Believe me. I know what I’m talking about.
Gobbo: Right…Well, you haven’t hid your disdain for Commissioner Preach since you have arrived in the MML. Why is that and Who would you rather have running the MML?
Drumph: First off. This One Tribe nonsense. I have my doubts that Preach is even an Orc? I want to see a Birth Certificate!! And Harry, did you know that Coach Tigershark of Thee Grandiose Gladiators was an original founder of the MML? and how Corrupt Commissioner Preach just took over?… Now Thee Gladiators lose almost as many games each season as The Morningstars? Coincidence or shenanigans? You know what I mean. If I could run the league I would immediately disband that loser Board and bring in someone with great ideas for the MML and Bretonnia! Coach Sir Ironclad! A man with a vision… to make Bretonnia Great Again!… by completely changing the Bretonnian roster!… But I don’t think his ideas are big enough!! I want Knights with STR 4 and mutations! And let’s move the whole League to the PC! Then the Morningstars can finally win ALL our matches!…when we stay on the PS4…and crush AI opponents!!! BWahahahahaha!
Gobbo: Well…um…I think I can safely say that Commissioner Preach and The MML are staying right where they are. But what is the future for The Morningstars? With no playoffs or Bowl game forthcoming, will the Morningstars return for Season 6? Will Coach Sturmjarl keep his job?
Drumph: I would never give the dispicable Commissioner Preach the satisfaction of leaving the Dungeon West or the MML Pros! And Head Coach Sturmjarl’s position in the organization is safe…mainly because nobody else will take the job. We have one more match against Coach CommieCOZY and Just Norsing Around in the Race to the Bottom! Where the loser will get the Number one draft pick before next season!!
Gobbo: Oh Count..That’s is most definitely not how the Transfer Market works *sigh*. (Read the rules Coaches!)
Drunph: WHAAATTT? It’s RIGGED I tell you! Believe MEEEE!!!
Making Bretonnia Great Again..?