Hello sports fans, this is Harry Gobbo for OSPN, coming to you live from tonight’s final between the Wrecking Kru and The Skuttle Butts! What a phenomenal game it was! Both teams played like champions, both teams gave it all they had, and in the end, it was our beloved Orc side that came out on top! It was all it was supposed to be, and more! The Wrecking Kru took the lead late in the first half on a touchdown by Gutrad, the star blitzer. The Kru managed to knock out several Skaven players, making the score relatively easy. They took that lead into the half, and then watched it disappear almost immediately as the Skaven scored very early in the second half. Unfortunately for the Skuttle Butts, they left too much time on the clock, and the Kru did what they do best; they marched for the winning score as time expired! Thrower Rotnail handed the ball to blitzer Takru, fresh off of an injury that caused him to miss the semi-final, who took the ball up the far sideline and gave extra effort to make the last few yards for the winning margin! We were able to catch up with Coach Caven after the trophy presentation.
Coach, how does it feel to be MML Champions?
“Well, honestly, I don’t think it has set in quite yet. We are thrilled with the victory, and honored to be able to hoist the MML trophy for all of our fans!”
What was your game plan going into this one? The Skuttle Butts are known for their excellent defense, so scoring against them had to be a concern?
“Yes, it was a huge concern for us. They had only given up 5 touchdowns total in their history, so we knew we would have to pull out all the tricks. We even decided that if we won the opening toss, we would elect to take the ball. We knew we had to make them play short-handed if we were to win, so taking out linerats was our main priority. Fortunately for us, they elected to kick and rely on that defense. We are disappointed that we didn’t cause many injuries, but we were able to knock out many of their players. To their credit, they have an excellent medical staff, that kept putting them back on the field. However, it continued to work in our favor. Having numbers against a faster team is key.”
How do you feel about the overall performance of the Kru tonight?
“We did enough to win. I am very concerned about Stonepuke, though. Once again, he failed to learn how to block properly, and it could be a detriment to us going in to next season. He was on the chopping block, but he threatened to fart in my general direction if we released him. I don’t know if you have ever smelled a Troll fart, but let’s just say that there aren’t many worse experiences in life. Except perhaps my ex-wife’s cooking! As for the team, we need to work on hitting harder. We almost stalled there at the end of the game, and only a heads up play by Rotnail saved the day for us. Handing the ball to Takru was not even in our initial play, but the Skuttle Butts took out Graoth, whom we wanted to get the ball to. Fortunately, Rotnail is proving to be an exceptional on field leader for us!”
The Skuttle Butts scored very easily early in the second half. Was that a concern for you?
“Of course it was! We are fortunate that they didn’t kill more of the clock, or we might still be playing. They ran through our defense like chili through a baby! It was very disappointing to see them have open field in front of them. We practiced all week leading up to this about spacing, keeping the enemy in front of us. We failed in that aspect. If this had gone to overtime, and they won the toss, I believe you would be interviewing Coach Spawn_of_Cthulu instead of me. They are a quality team, and will be a difficult opponent next season as their rookies gain in skill and confidence. I fully expect to see them challenge for the title next season.”
Coach, you have a unique opportunity as a coach tomorrow, as you lead the Andor Wolves into the HUMANitarian final. How does that feel?
“Obviously it would be great to win that title, as well. But remember, I will be coaching a human squad, not an Orc side. You just can’t count on Humans to maim and injure their opponents, and you can’t push opponents around like Orcs can. It will be a different game plan tomorrow.”
Coach, one more question before we let you join your team in the locker room. What do you expect for next season? Do you have plans to add any more players to the roster?
“Harry, that’s two questions! But, I will answer both of them, because I am in a good mood. We expect to have a target on our backs. We expect to get the best from every opponent we face next season. We also expect to give our best to every opponent. It is the way of the Orc, the way of Blood Bowl. As to adding players, we do not have any plans to add any pieces yet. We understand that many teams are going outside their own farm systems to obtain players and improve their rosters, but we don’t want to buy a championship. We wanted to earn it with our own players. We want to stay true to the game and respect the game. However, we will not rule out going through the transfer process to stay competitive. We are sporting, but we aren’t stupid!”
Well, there you have it, folks! Exclusive first interview with head coach Caven of the Wrecking Kru, following their 2-1 victory over the Skuttle Butts in the MML Finals! That’s all for this season, and we sincerely hope to see you opening day next season right here on OSPN! This is Harry Gobbo, signing off, and remember, if it’s fit to print, it’s not in OSPN!