Referee, Dignity, Coaches Board conspire to steal game from Wrecking Kru

Hello sports fans! Here we are, once again, at ‘Ome Turf, home of defending champion Wrecking Kru. This is Harry Gobbo, speaking to you from the relative safety of Coach Caven’s office. Security has been busy trying to quell the anger rising up from Kru fans. This is one of the worst decisions I have ever witnessed. A complete travesty, and quite frankly, an abomination. We will let Coach Caven tell the story.

Coach, what happened out there?

“Well Harry, as you, and our fans know, we won the overtime toss. We elected to receive the ball. However, the referee decided to make us kick the ball. We protested. He forced us to kick anyway. Game is tied 1-1, next score ends the game. Why would we kick? Why would we give our opponents three distinct advantages? They get to set up second, they get to hit first, they get the ball. Some may say I chose to kick, then changed my mind (misclick). I am adamantly and vehemently saying that I chose to receive, knowing we had two more men on the pitch than they did, and they would have to get the ball from us to win without any rerolls where we had one. Everything was in our favor. Except the referee. We appealed to the Coaches board for a replay. They denied us. Now, here is the tricky part. Coach Sestonn is on the Coaches board. I am not. There is certainly familiarity within that group with him. Cronyism? Probably. They all know each other. They have meetings together to make the rules of the MML. Another point. Sestonn and Dignity made no bones about wanting it to be an all-Elf final. The referee just happens to hand the game to Dignity? I don’t believe in coincidence. Dignity paid the ref, knowing the Coaches Board, and ergo, the MML would back them if anything happened. Coach Sestonn even offered to let fate decide our game by trying to tie it to the Pumas/Treehawks game. If Treehawks won, Dignity would advance. Pretty nice tying your outcome to a decided favorite in a game, isn’t it? I believe this. It is bad for the MML to have an Orc team repeat as champions of the MML. We were 4-0 in playoff appearances before this. We had been in two other OT games, and we chose to receive both times. It has never changed. Now, Dignity is gifted a victory because of this. Some are saying a 50/50 coin toss. WE WON THE TOSS!! It wasn’t 50/50 at that point. We chose to receive. Now the Coaches Board says it would be bad for them to get involved and make a decision and to let the game stand. Now, if there are any irregularities, such as the “disappearing elf” or another botched kickoff call, or any number of things, the result will have to stand, regardless of how unfair it is. We will be protesting the rest of the playoffs, and will be instituting #tainted to everything Dignity does for the rest of this playoffs. To me, the MML now has a big fat black eye. They sided with their guy, because he is on the board. They can deny it, and probably will. They can give out any number of reasons, but to me, they are questioning my integrity that I indeed chose to receive, and the referee made us kick. Why even have a coaches board if they aren’t going to make things right? It’s a sham. The MML has lost some of its luster today, and I for one am embarrassed as a Coach of an MML team. I have no further comments on this.”

Well, there you have it, folks. The MML has seen fit to gift a tainted victory to Dignity. Small wonder. They had the headlines and spotlight all season long, didn’t they? Their coach sits on the insidious Coaches Board, doesn’t he? This outrageous decision comes as no surprise to Wrecking Kru fans, and is vaguely reminiscent of Imperial Politics. Drumph probably has a hand in this, as well. So, to all the Kru fans, we hurt for you. You were denied a chance at history because of cronyism and bribery and a complete lack of backbone to make the right decision! Next season will have to provide some great games and teams in order to cover up this shameful event. For OSPN, I’m Harry Gobbo, signing off.


  1. I would like to state that this is written “in character”. It is not a personal attack on anyone, at all, ever. If you take it is a personal attack, you should probably re-read it.

    Yes, I am extremely disappointed that it wasn’t made right. I was victimized by a glitch, that has happened before (on PC). I hope the remaining playoff games go off without a hitch, or glitch. Thanks for reading and understanding that this is JUST A STORY!

  2. I applaud your use of a frustrating and unfortunate situation to write a creatively scandalous story and get the readers talking. I just hope you know that, on the real, your credibility has bever been in question.

  3. Jest, just wait until Dignity and Wrecking Kru meet in regular season game next season. IT’S ON!!!

  4. Really unfortunate end to a well-coached, tightly contested game. Really could have gone to either side all the way to the finish!

  5. Very class article, making fun about it wouldn’t have been everyone’s reaction. Congratulations, that’s a Champion behaviour

  6. yeah i agree with stunty i probably would have been madder the a hater in your spot caven

  7. Crazy tough break, Caven. Definitely “salt-worthy”, but great material to spin. “Almost” wish it happened to the Morningstars!
    #Drumph material for AGES!!

  8. This is the stuff that great rivalries are made from. Really like the article… Nice work Harry Gobbo and Caven. 😉

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